Thursday, July 17, 2014

The Do's and Don'ts of Impressing Book Nerds

The Do's & Don'ts of Impressing Book Nerds

You've got a crush on the girl who squeal whenever she hears the name John Green? You try impressing by telling her you love John Green even though you have not read any books by that author; you've only seen the movie of The Fault In Our Stars. Guess what?! It works. She's totally interested now, but when it is goodbye time, you are clueless what to reply after she says "DFTBA." And just like that, she no longer wants to talk to you. 

Don't be that guy. There are effective ways to impress us without being a total nerd (even though that is a big plus). Even if you just want to be friends or date a book nerd, there are good ways to impress them. Here are the Do's and Don'ts 

Interest in Books 
DO NOT: ever pretend that you have read a book that she is talking about, especially if you've only seen the movie. No matter how faithful the movie to the book is, there are things that the movie cannot show. If she asks you about writing style of the author, you are totally dead. Remember: there is a reason why books are better than movies. 

DO: show interest on what she is talking about. We, book nerds, love talking to people who have not read the book about what we've read. If we make them read it, it is a big polish to our pride. If you don't know what she is talking about, ask her what is it about. That will make her explode in happiness, knowing she can make you experience the wonders of a beautiful book. End the conversation that maybe you'll pick the book in the library when you get the time. 

Patience Inside The Bookstore
DO NOT: be impatient inside a bookstore especially when we book nerds are browsing, because 
  1. looking for a book is divine and takes a lot of time 
  2. money is involved. We don't want to waste our money to a horribly written books 
  3. it's therapy for us. 
DO: let us browse. You don't have to watch us while we browse. Ask us questions, we don't mind. It means you show interest in what we like. If the person you are trying to impress really want some alone time, do not slump somewhere to wait-- browse too, even though you don't plan on buying something. If we see you browsing, that is one big points. And for bonus point, try buying one book. And if we ask you what is it about, tell us.

Fictional Boys
DO NOT: say that fictional boys are unrealistic. If you are trying to impress a girl, saying she would never find a boy like the characters in books is like saying Jesus is not real to catholics. They tend to have high expectations, but if you ride with their fandom, they will see that you are a reflection of a true fictional character. Fictional characters have flaws too but readers oversee them, because (mostly) the narrator is in love with the boy of the book.

DO: listen to them talk about their fictional characters. Their standards might be high, but if you listen to them, it will really impress them. One of the good qualities of fictional boyfriends is they are good listeners. 

Favorite Authors
DO NOT: insult their favorite authors. We, book nerds, adore our favorite authors. They are the creators of the characters and the worlds we have fallen in love with. Insulting them is like insulting our parents. And especially do not insult the author if you've only seen the movie of the book adaptation. 

DO: offer your insights about their favorite authors. Tell us why you like them or why you don't like them. We will understand. If you hate the transition of the author from narration to scene, tell us then. It will show that you have good taste and know what you are talking about; don't just say "that author sucks. What she writes is so gay." Sad to say, but saying your insights like that is making yourself looks small.  

Reading Is Not A Waste Of Time 
DO NOT: say that reading is a waste of time or "do something else other than read." It is insulting. Reading is fun and productive for us bookworms. This is our lives, so if you say "get a life" while we are reading, do not be surprised if we chuck a hardcover to your face. 

DO: look at reading as a productive hobby (Because it is!) This is like sports, we have fun doing it and it is also productive. When we read, give us space. We might read a lot, but if we give our time to a person it means he or she deserves it. If you are not getting enough attention from us, well you might not deserve it, so try harder. 

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